Comments for Confessing my Dad Attitude

Comment on Father’s Day, 2009: Goals & Priorities by Ekaterina Walter

Ekaterina Walter — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 02:11:17 +0000

Enjoyed reading your post, Gary. Now that I am a mother for the last 4 months, I can totally relate

By the way, GREAT blog and website. Utterly enjoyed the pictures!

Comment on Free-dumb? by Kelly

Kelly — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 00:22:37 +0000

Losing my job last year was a shocking experience, but one of the things I knew on that day was that I would find another one. I didn’t know when, and I didn’t know how, but it would happen. Seven and a half months later, it finally did. I told someone the other day that I spent maybe an hour during that whole period worrying. About money, about the next job, about anything.

And I loved those months of not working.

Comment on Mercy, Compassion, Empathy, and Self-Differentiation by danceswithklingons

danceswithklingons — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 05:15:41 +0000

This is what No More Christan Nice Guy by Paul Coughlin points out. You are not a passive man, Gary, thank God for that.
Jesus was never manipulated either.

KTijunait: You are wise about praying on if we should step in.
You may not be the part of Christ that needs to do the work in that person’s life.
More people are in need of having their hearts changed from stone to flesh, I know because I used to have a heart of stone, unmoving, but just recently the Holy Spirit really came into my life and I see that same Spirit in Gary

Though Gary and I have only communicated with internet social networks, I have been praying for him and I know that our Father has more work to do through him. The “religious” keepers do not know God and will have problems with those who know Him.

We are meant to be inter-dependent. not co-dependent. When we work WITH each other in the Spirit, the Kingdom is there. When you need someone to affirm your identity as an individual, then you are NOT in the Kingdom or Spirit.

I’m reminded of what Jesus said to do if you are not received in a town, kick off the dust and leave without making a scene. You did the right thing Gary. I don’t think that you don’t have compassion for those that need it. The arrogant will be “left behind” and God will deal with them.

Good post, Gary.
You are Blessed.

Comment on Mercy, Compassion, Empathy, and Self-Differentiation by KTijunait

KTijunait — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 05:02:15 +0000

Interesting points you bring up…I will have to read that book. I have been accused of the same thing….not having much mercy or compassion but I have come to the conclusion over the past few years that I just show it in a different way. I don’t run to everyones beck and call in time of need or want….(the other personality types usually beat me to it anyway) but I am praying for them and when all resources have run out and others are gone and the person is still in need I am usually there. Also what is interesting is the type of commpassion I show is often forgotten quickly or goes mostly unnoticed because it is “smaller” or not as “showy”. Also I have had hurtful situations where I have shown compassion in very practical ways to famiy members and it was not viewed as compassion at all but was viewed as something “expected”. That is were you do have to look at the enabling thing. God can read the heart and can show us when and how to be compassionate. I like your statement about blind compassion…I have often thought that if God is working with someone on an issue I don’t want to get in the way by doing or offering something that would hinder that growth or healing. We still love that person and pray for them and ask the God if we should step in or not.

Comment on Mercy, Compassion, Empathy, and Self-Differentiation by gwalter

gwalter — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 04:22:57 +0000

Interesting question. I believe everyone gets an opportunity, however, after 20 years n the streets, I’m a little more cynical than the average Joe. For me, it’s an intuitive thing. When I feel that my boundaries are being crossed, that’s when I begin to retract.

When Britney first had her breakdown, I was moved to compassion – child star, manipulative systems, etc – but when she went back into the lifestyle, my compassion turned to tough love. The compassion is still there, it’s just manifested differently.

Comment on Mercy, Compassion, Empathy, and Self-Differentiation by blogan

blogan — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 03:22:27 +0000

I know where you’re coming from. It’s easy to say someone doesn’t deserve compassion because they caused their own problems, or they’re manipulating you, or whatever. The trouble is, I find I’m not a good judge of circumstances or character. For example, would Britney Spears deserve compassion or not? Pre-breakdown or post? By your standards, I don’t know. Do you?

Comment on Free-dumb? by Terre

Terre — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 22:09:49 +0000

Gary, Thanks for sharing your thoughts and current life changes. You have such a way with words…the thoughts flow and connect well. It makes for easy reading. Have you considered put a book together?

When you get back, and your family has settled and rested, give me a call or drop me a line. I would like to hook up before the next big adventure begins and we loose this opportunity.

I have added your and family to my daily prayer list. Our Father IS. He is in control and is watching over His children – even those over 50!
Remember, “Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God’s world by mistake.” (I believe it.)

Comment on Vive la dérive! by Rubyjean

Rubyjean — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 22:00:16 +0000

WONDERFUL!!!!!!

Comment on Father’s Day, 2009: Goals & Priorities by Rubyjean

Rubyjean — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 21:45:31 +0000

I really like your openness. You don’t dance around the bush, you are real and honest and direct. I love it that you put your family FIRST and are willing to keep it that way. I am really distressed that you have been asked to change that priority. It isn’t right, it isn’t fair, and it is NOT what God would ask of you. He didn’t give you a wonderful wife and adorable children for them to take second place in your life.

Stay the course and God WILL continue to bless you and yours and lead you and when you enter the Pearly gates, you will not be asked, “where is the precious flock that I gave you?” they will be with you.

I didn’t put my family first, I put my job first, after all, I did have to support them, didn’t I? What will be my answer to the above question? I wonder often, is it my fault? Did I fail?

With love and concern…
rjc

Comment on Father’s Day, 2009: Goals & Priorities by Terre

Terre — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 15:58:19 +0000

Gary, thanks for sharing the pictures, and your thoughts on fatherhood, -especially reiterating your goals. Those seem like very achievable goals and realistic priorities. I’d like to stand in support of your list and join you in striving to achieve them in our personal lives.

Gratefully, we have found the joy and freedom in being able to claim “spiritual progress not spiritual perfection”. We aren’t saints; but we are Dads.

Happy Father’s Day to you, my friend!

(PS: I will be looking for your progress report in 6 months!)